Depressed?

Am I depressed? I dunno, sometimes I'd say definitely, but tonight I saw "Oprah" that had some crazy doctor on it who said to someone else (not me) "You're not depressed...you're just bored...you have too much time on your hands" and it got me thinking. Am I just too bored? I'd say "Yes."

There are sometimes when I'm highly motivated, say, most recently, when I'm preparing meals for myself. I've really been enjoying blending smoothies and cooking on a more regular basis. However, I'm still not so great at cleaning up immediately afterwards (except the blender). And when dishes pile up, I slack off in every other regard, and dump clothes everywhere, or whatever.

I recently joined a gym as well, and should be able to do a workout every weekday during lunch, so long as lunch and smoothie snack are planned and figured out in advance. I've been sick for so long, and coughing (respiratory infection) that I haven't been running like I'd planned to. Now that I've got a new schedule, and slightly more motivation in some ways, I'd like to start that up again too, and just live a super healthy and motivated life. However the TV seems to be draining the motivation, leaving me lazy, and making me bored.

However, the TV is also nice for other reasons. For example, I learn SOME Korean, small bits here and there from the TV. I also stay more current on Korean culture and trends (that I can then use or talk about in classes). And the TV also keeps me from being too lonely (after all, I live completely alone here). I do have friends, but friends can't be around all the time. Anyway, I dunno. I have a feeling I should just unplug the TV, at least for a while, but then I think I'd just be MORE bored. There are times between classes when I come home and can't do anything except prepare a meal and eat before I'm off to the next class (speaking of which, I'm teaching at 6 schools now, and have one extra (should have been cancelled class after my lunch hour) which makes a noon gym run more difficult), and I just don't know what I would do with that time if not for the TV. I couldn't read, music might work SOME, but sometimes it's only for a few minutes, and it's also nice to FEEL like there are other people nearby. I used to be so social, these days, I watch it on TV. I think I should stop, and do something else, but what motivation can I find in other things? I dunno. I used to try harder when someone was pushing me to do well, or do something specific, but these days, no one challenges me but myself. And it's alot harder for me to challenge myself and do things alone.

Maybe I am bored, and not depressed. But alone is just so boring.